Obama To Determine Global Temperature

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By Elmer Beauregard

President Obama has achieved Godlike status and is now determining what the globe's temperature should be.

Popama.jpgIn an article about the upcoming economic summit in Italy, it is stated that President Obama will limit the increase in the earth's temperature to 2 degrees.
Here is that quote.

"He'll arrive Wednesday in Italy reportedly prepared to embrace the broad goal of limiting global warming to an increase of 2 degrees Celsius -- 3.6 degrees Fahrenheit -- in the global average temperature."

I was amazed to read this, the discussion went form how much CO2 the peasants should be allowed to emit, to actually deciding what the temperature should be.

If it were up to me I could see an increase of 5 degree C. You're going to need at least that much to make Siberia and parts of Canada inhabitable, not to mention northern Minnesota.

Appropriately enough, Mr. Obama will also be meeting with the Pope to discuss the weather, I mean recent "Global Warming" (formerly known as "Summer"). Maybe, together these two deities will decide what the Globe's temperature shall be.

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I am enthralled to know that Obama-the-Great possesses supernatural powers that allow him to dictate climate. I would like to put in a personal request for north-central Montana - not too warm, not too cold, but jussst riiiight! Wait, that's a different fairy tale, isn't it? On the other hand, his decree should be easy to uphold, particularly since, as you have pointed out, temps have actually been decreasing. He might as well issue another proclamation that all items thrown up into the air, must fall back to earth. Then he can figure out a way to cap and tax gravity, too.

I like your idea, maybe we should hire weather lobbyists.

Steve Z., I'm sympathetic. What I'd like to see the Popama do is meet your personal request for north-central Montana while also meeting the same criteria for north Texas. That would really demonstrate divinity.

Actually, what I'd really like to see the Popama do is go home, take his Chicago Way with him, sit down, and shut up, but that ain't gonna happen, either.

This is great! It is just a first step. Next we need to tackle winter and other weather problems!!! We have way too much winter. Cold weather increases oil consumption, thereby contributing to global warming. Ban winter and snow now. The government should institute a policy that the tempurature should go no lower than 60 degrees and no higher than 90 degrees. Rain shall fall once per week (not on weekends) so we don't need to water the lawns.

You made some good points there. I did a search on the topic and found most people will agree with your blog.

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This page contains a single entry by Elmer published on July 7, 2009 1:39 PM.

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